#1209: “Is there a way to get good at setting boundaries that isn’t so situation-specific?” (Boundaries School!)

Hello, Captain! Could you talk about how to be good at setting boundaries in a non-situation-specific way? You get a lot of letters from people who are having trouble with someone else not respecting their boundaries, and obviously that is not the time to say "are you sure you really communicated what you meant?" But … Continue reading #1209: “Is there a way to get good at setting boundaries that isn’t so situation-specific?” (Boundaries School!)

#917: “How to set boundaries with people who think boundaries and hurt are manipulative? AKA Help implementing boundary advice?”

Hello, Cap and friends! I have a couple of questions about boundary-setting with people who don't believe in boundaries. The Awkward team's advice and scripts on setting boundaries have been so wonderfully helpful in my life, but what (if anything) can you say to people who believe that setting boundaries in a family is controlling? … Continue reading #917: “How to set boundaries with people who think boundaries and hurt are manipulative? AKA Help implementing boundary advice?”

#825, #826, #827: The Art of Losing Is Actually Pretty Hard To Master

A series of letters from people who are trying to disengage but don't know how. There's some really toxic addiction and abusive behavior described in some of the letters, so, know that going in. Hey Captain Awkward, This is the LW of #776. This time my question isn’t about dealing with Toby’s parents, but Toby … Continue reading #825, #826, #827: The Art of Losing Is Actually Pretty Hard To Master

#459: Do I have to destroy my health to be in grad school?

I'm in grad school for creative writing. It's hard. Right now, I'm taking three classes, which means that I'm reading 500-plus pages a week, in addition to commenting on my classmates' writing and producing a poem every week. Plus, I'm teaching a basic composition course for struggling writers, and a literature course (for the first … Continue reading #459: Do I have to destroy my health to be in grad school?

#335: How do I set a boundary with my friend without hurting her feelings?

Dear Captain Awkward, I have a best friend.  We've known each other for a long time, gone through some really rough times together as we both coped with mental illness, toxic families, financial hardship and general shenanigans.  Being single ladies who are at the asexual end of the scale, we share a house, and have … Continue reading #335: How do I set a boundary with my friend without hurting her feelings?

#273: “My kid won’t be visiting you”: Steps on becoming an Emotional Badass

Hello Captain! I am in serious need of some guidance. I'll do my best to keep the background info to being pertinent to the situation. Here it goes. I have a wonderful four year old son with my terrible, emotionally-abusive ex. I left him when my son was a little over a year old and … Continue reading #273: “My kid won’t be visiting you”: Steps on becoming an Emotional Badass

#270: I’m using my words, but the other people aren’t listening. What now?

Hi, Captain Awkward: I used to have a really hard time using my words, but therapy is awesome and now I will totally tell people, in words, when what they are doing really needs to stop. I'm stuck, though, on how to respond to people who repeatedly ignore my words when I use them. Example, … Continue reading #270: I’m using my words, but the other people aren’t listening. What now?