#1230 and #1231: Conversations that are mostly negotiations with ourselves and our feelings.

If you end up trying to negotiate with your feelings, especially Future Feelings that Future You isn't even feeling yet, use action there, too, like: "If this was a mistake and someday I feel the thing I'm so afraid to feel, what (if anything) will I do about it?" Feelings are coming one way or another, you aren't the boss of them but they definitely aren't the boss of you, either. Make friends with them, invite them in, see what they have to tell you. You can decide what to do about them. 

A++ Recommend! Scarleteen’s “Embracing Newbiehood: How to Approach Dating and Sex in Your 20s With Little or No Experience”

This piece written by Cass Ball is great. And you can safely replace "20s" with "any part of adulthood." Now's the part where I physically restrain myself from quoting the entire thing: "When I’m coming from a place of scarcity, a place where everything feels like it isn’t enough,I often feel that I’m insufficient without … Continue reading A++ Recommend! Scarleteen’s “Embracing Newbiehood: How to Approach Dating and Sex in Your 20s With Little or No Experience”

#1206: How do explain that I’m almost-but-not-quite divorced in my brand new dating profile?

Hello Captain Awkward, Last month my husband and I (she/her) separated; it was my choice and I stayed in the home while he moved out. We were in couple’s therapy for several years leading up to the split and for the last part of the relationship we were living as roommates. For almost the last … Continue reading #1206: How do explain that I’m almost-but-not-quite divorced in my brand new dating profile?

It Came From The Search Terms: January Song

It is time for the return of the feature where we answer things people typed into search engines to find this place as if they are questions. Obviously we are missing details and nuance and the larger story. (That's what makes it fun). First, as traditional: music with the month somewhere in the song. https://youtu.be/jpVgPEWNiRkContinue reading It Came From The Search Terms: January Song

Happy Birthday, Scarleteen!

Scarleteen is a national treasure. The site celebrated its 20th birthday over the weekend. Heather Corinna and team have built and maintained a place where young people can go to find safe, honest, scientifically sound, inclusive, accurate, non-judgmental information about sex, sexual health, and healthy relationships for TWENTY! years. Amazing work, y'all. While I suggest … Continue reading Happy Birthday, Scarleteen!

It Came From The Search Terms: Fall Into November

It's time for that mostly monthly tradition where we answer the things people typed into search engines as if they are questions. First, as is traditional, a song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E5Gu6c3YFCM Now, the terms! 1 "Captain Awkward is fat" Fuck yeah I am! 2 "Is it weird to feel lonely in a relationship of 6 months together" … Continue reading It Came From The Search Terms: Fall Into November