Licensed therapist Rae McDaniel reminds a reader that discomfort is not harm, and trans people aren't messing up their family events by existing at them.
Category: self-care
#1292: “My creep sister is forwarding my queer child’s social media posts to our conservative parents. How to draw a boundary without outing my kid?”
"I'm not a bigot, I'm just really *worried* that you and your child are total deviants who don't deserve rights." -Some Dipshit
#1289: “A potential friend is now an ex, and I don’t know why.”
"Let's be friends 4-ever" is a wish, not a promise, so it was in the high school yearbook, and so it is at work.
#1284: “I have to see my ex again in a year and it is a constantly ticking time bomb in my head.”
Sometimes your brain just wants to be obsessed with somebody for a while. Hi Captain, My now ex (he/him), and I (she/her) broke up at the end of May. It was pretty much mutual. He asked if we could stop being exclusive for a while (we were long distance). I was already having other problems … Continue reading #1284: “I have to see my ex again in a year and it is a constantly ticking time bomb in my head.”
It Came From The Search Terms: July 2020
Yes! It is time! Time to treat the search strings people typed in right before they washed up on these blog shores as if they are actual questions! Inside: Mask etiquette, reformed Nice Guy™ apologies, overly-neighborly neighbors, favor-sharking defined, and more.
#1281: “Every conversation with my mom is an interrogation of my life choices.”
How does a gentle reminder about doing your laundry from someone who loves you become an existential struggle? Plus, strategies for changing unhealthy communication patterns that do not rely on *persuading* the other person to change for you. Dear Captain Awkward, What are some good scripts for telling my mother I don't want or need … Continue reading #1281: “Every conversation with my mom is an interrogation of my life choices.”
#1280: “Am I a terrible daughter for moving out and leaving my mom to care for my grandma?”
Hi Captain, I'm the youngest kid in a South Asian family. I've lived with my parents for four years because I have a career in the arts and have only recently started to earn enough money to pay rent and also, like, eat. I've also stayed with them this long because my frail grandma lives … Continue reading #1280: “Am I a terrible daughter for moving out and leaving my mom to care for my grandma?”
#1279: “My metamour isn’t taking social-distancing precautions and my partner is unfazed.”
Dear Captain, My partner (P) and I (both mid-30s, she/her) are happily engaged, and have been living together for a few years now. Things have been great. We’ve both had a lot of trauma to work through, and have been nothing but supportive and understanding with each other as each we’ve dealt with our own … Continue reading #1279: “My metamour isn’t taking social-distancing precautions and my partner is unfazed.”
#1277: “Abuse, agency, and the limits of advice.”
Behind a cut for mention of physical and emotional abuse of adult children by parents as well as some frustrations and victim-blaming attitudes that are common in friends and support networks of people who are embroiled in abusive situations. Abusers ruin everything, pretty much. Dear Captain Awkward, I (31, nb, he/him) have a friend who … Continue reading #1277: “Abuse, agency, and the limits of advice.”
#1276: “Setting boundaries when there’s a significant power difference (and you’re the one with less)”
Hi Captain, I’m wondering if you have a script for setting boundaries where there’s a significant power differential. Briefly, I’ve recently hired a lawyer who specializes in disability rights to represent me in a human rights case against a corporation that discriminated against me based on my mental health disability. The lawyer is very competent, … Continue reading #1276: “Setting boundaries when there’s a significant power difference (and you’re the one with less)”
