Your partner's ex, your partner's friend group, your partner's life choices are your partner's job to manage.
"Good news, I finally persuaded my fiancée to let me sleep with other people, now we can finally act out all my fantasies about you over Zoom!" Whoa, seems sexy!
Like the creative writing workshop advice goes, if one person tells you a piece of feedback about your story, that's just their opinion, but if ten people give you the same note, there's probably something worth paying attention to on the input side.
When someone says "I don't have romantic feelings for you," take them at their word.
Two spouses wrote to me and I don't want to post the letters full of painful details but I also could not leave it alone.
"You dumped me, remember? Kindly sigh into someone else's moving boxes."
Feelings (jealousy, discomfort, biphobia) clean-up in Aisle 7.
Numbness can be a survival skill, but the feeling's gotta come back sometime.
I believe the classic phrase is "don't set yourself on fire to keep somebody else warm."
"You're chopping the peppers wrong," or, when cooking together stops being a fun date-night activity.