Content note/reminder that describing bigotry accurately sometimes includes examples. Followed by the usual reminders that boundaries are more about deciding what you will do than about what you can convince other people to do.
Category: Geek Social Fallacies
#1335: Advice about anxiety about over-committing to in-person hangouts written by a person with ADHD who struggles with time.
When fear of over-committing meets terror of letting other people down, that's where you'll find me and way more than one of you, if my inbox is any indication.
#1334: “If someone keeps RSVP-ing “yes” but never attending, do I have to keep inviting them to stuff?”
Here is blanket permission to not worry very much about offending people who neither show up to your parties nor ever explain why.
#1327: “My best friend’s other best friend is The Worst. How do I free myself without losing my friend?”
Sometimes when you stop trying to make yourself like someone, it's easier to keep the peace at parties.
#1322: “My friend’s (white female) roommate is a creepy creep.”
"Don't touch me" isn't complicated. You know who makes it complicated? CREEPS, THAT'S WHO.
#1308: How do I deal with my edgelord friend?
Just spitballing here, but what if my fellow white people took bigotry in our social spaces incredibly fucking seriously for a change?
#1263: “I apologized and it made everything weirder. What’s really going on?”
Dear Captain, I've looked in the archives for something like this, but I couldn't find anything. What do you do when you apologize and it seems to upset someone even more? I (she/her) have an ex (he/him), and we have recently reconnected after a breakup and period of no contact and are trying to be … Continue reading #1263: “I apologized and it made everything weirder. What’s really going on?”
#1251: “My friends are mad because I don’t like talking in the dreaded Group Chat from WhatsApp Hell.”
Dear Captain, I looked through the archives and I couldn't see anything on this particular topic, but apologies if I missed something. It does seem connected to the Geek Social Fallacies though. My question is about how to deal with awkwardness and anxieties over the dreaded Group Chat. I have a group of friends who … Continue reading #1251: “My friends are mad because I don’t like talking in the dreaded Group Chat from WhatsApp Hell.”
#1220: “Is this guy constantly texting me after I told him not to because he ‘doesn’t understand’ boundaries or because he doesn’t care about them?”
Dear Captain Awkward, I ( 27, she/her) have an acquaintance (29, he/him) who is not neurotypical (he told me this). His preferred mode of communication is texting and he frequently tries to have long, involved text conversations with me. I was pretty tolerant of this at first, but it’s gotten a bit wearing. I’ve told … Continue reading #1220: “Is this guy constantly texting me after I told him not to because he ‘doesn’t understand’ boundaries or because he doesn’t care about them?”
#1219: “My good friend’s boyfriend keeps ‘negging’ me.”
People are always full of advice for what a woman should do about a man's rude behavior (like patronizing comments or unfunny mean jokes at her expense that don't land right) and it's almost never saying "Bro? No. No, Bro" and expecting him to change his behavior.
CaptainAwkward.com 