Here is blanket permission to not worry very much about offending people who neither show up to your parties nor ever explain why.
Category: Friendship
#1333: Multi-Level Marketing Cults & Performative Friendship
How to plot the accumulated costs of "useless objects" vs. "pointless arguments" over time?
#1330: “I don’t want this friend as a roommate or a summer houseguest, but my sibling and I sort of already agreed.”
People who won't take 'no' for an answer often present the risk as you being seen as mean or selfish when you don't do what they want, when really, it's that if you don't say 'no' you have to put up with them in your personal space. Re-balance your risk assessments, friend!
#1329: “Is this ever going to work out in my favor?”
When someone says "I don't have romantic feelings for you," take them at their word.
#1327: “My best friend’s other best friend is The Worst. How do I free myself without losing my friend?”
Sometimes when you stop trying to make yourself like someone, it's easier to keep the peace at parties.
#1324: “I moved out of a terrible roommate situation two years ago, but our mutuals won’t stop trying to ‘make peace.'”
"I hated living with them so I moved the hell out. What is there to 'mediate?'"
Vaccines: Envy & Etiquette
What to do when everyone you know is getting vaccinated, except for you? What about when you're the relatively fortunate person? Also, what about relatives who refuse to be immunized? Here are some thoughts about that.
#1322: “My friend’s (white female) roommate is a creepy creep.”
"Don't touch me" isn't complicated. You know who makes it complicated? CREEPS, THAT'S WHO.
#1321: “I have nightmares about hosting the Fancy Lady Craft Circle in my terrible apartment.”
There's a lot to be said sometimes for faking it until you make it, but I'm a big fan of dropping the act and dropping the shame right along with it.
“I want to reach out but I have no idea what to say.”
If you don't know what to say, revert to first principles: Something is probably better than nothing.
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