On calling bluffs, escape velocity, and the futile, necessary, but probably still futile, work of reclaiming some of our relatives from history's flaming dumpster. Content note: Sometimes honestly talking about authoritarian stuff and white supremacy means describing it, so there are examples of actual racist and xenophobic statements from relatives herein.
Category: Families
#1302: Guest Post: “When your hosts are doing you a favor but their housekeeping habits are making you sad and ill.”
Hello, this week we have a guest post from Rachel Hoffman of Unf*ck Your Habitat blog and book fame about the tricky balance of maintaining your own sanity (and sanitation) in a house where you are a guest.
Links: The Holidays and What To Do About Them
Weird holidays, weird year.
#1293: “I’m worried my family’s anger about me being a trans man will overshadow my sister’s wedding.”
Licensed therapist Rae McDaniel reminds a reader that discomfort is not harm, and trans people aren't messing up their family events by existing at them.
#1292: “My creep sister is forwarding my queer child’s social media posts to our conservative parents. How to draw a boundary without outing my kid?”
"I'm not a bigot, I'm just really *worried* that you and your child are total deviants who don't deserve rights." -Some Dipshit
#1291: “My husband is never, ever sorry.”
If he apologizes he might shatter into a million little pieces, this is Very Serious!
#1288: “Saying ‘No’ To The Dress & My Overbearing Sister”
The world is on fire (in some places, quite literally), but it's a weird sort of comforting to know that wedding planning can still bring out the family bullies and control freaks like nothing else.
#1286: “How do I create good art when life is tough and might not get easier?”
Dear Captain, The situation: I (she/her) am a homemaker and mum to a toddler. I’ve suffered from depression, anxiety, and fibromyalgia for eighteen years, aka my entire adult life and then some. I’m on meds and pretty much a self-care rockstar, but I still spend LOTS of time and energy coping with pain, fatigue, dizziness, … Continue reading #1286: “How do I create good art when life is tough and might not get easier?”
#1285: “My sister is in love with someone she knows tried to rape me.”
The subject title is the content warning. No graphic details, but the situation is exactly that bad.
#1281: “Every conversation with my mom is an interrogation of my life choices.”
How does a gentle reminder about doing your laundry from someone who loves you become an existential struggle? Plus, strategies for changing unhealthy communication patterns that do not rely on *persuading* the other person to change for you. Dear Captain Awkward, What are some good scripts for telling my mother I don't want or need … Continue reading #1281: “Every conversation with my mom is an interrogation of my life choices.”