How do you back out when when someone manipulates you - successfully- into something you don't want to do? Plus, help for when you need to ghost a baby and his manipulative parents.
Category: ethics
It Came From The Search Terms: July 2020
Yes! It is time! Time to treat the search strings people typed in right before they washed up on these blog shores as if they are actual questions! Inside: Mask etiquette, reformed Nice Guy™ apologies, overly-neighborly neighbors, favor-sharking defined, and more.
#1279: “My metamour isn’t taking social-distancing precautions and my partner is unfazed.”
Dear Captain, My partner (P) and I (both mid-30s, she/her) are happily engaged, and have been living together for a few years now. Things have been great. We’ve both had a lot of trauma to work through, and have been nothing but supportive and understanding with each other as each we’ve dealt with our own … Continue reading #1279: “My metamour isn’t taking social-distancing precautions and my partner is unfazed.”
#1277: “Abuse, agency, and the limits of advice.”
Behind a cut for mention of physical and emotional abuse of adult children by parents as well as some frustrations and victim-blaming attitudes that are common in friends and support networks of people who are embroiled in abusive situations. Abusers ruin everything, pretty much. Dear Captain Awkward, I (31, nb, he/him) have a friend who … Continue reading #1277: “Abuse, agency, and the limits of advice.”
#1274 and #1275: COVID-19 and Family Visits and Weddings
Hi, Captain, To cut to the chase, I (she/her) have an autoimmune disease for which I take several immunosuppressant medications — none of which are working particularly well. My parents are both over the age of 60. You can probably tell where this is going. My sister (she/her) is getting married at the end of … Continue reading #1274 and #1275: COVID-19 and Family Visits and Weddings
#1272: “White Family Facebook Drama Over Police Racism”
Dear Cap, I've (she/her) got White Family Facebook Drama over police racism, regarding my (male) officer cousins, D and A. I began publicly supporting the Black Lives Matter movement in 2016, and they became distant but civil. (It was hard because D and I had been friendly on social media before that, but I didn’t … Continue reading #1272: “White Family Facebook Drama Over Police Racism”
#1271: “I went no-contact with an abusive parent who is dying now. What are the rules here?”
Content notes for alcohol addiction, emotional abuse, illness requiring hospitalization. O Captain, My Captain, My mother was always (imo) an emotionally abusive narcissist. I'm the oldest of 3 and the scapegoat. She became an alcoholic when I was 16 or 17, has been hospitalised with liver failure a number of times in the last 12 … Continue reading #1271: “I went no-contact with an abusive parent who is dying now. What are the rules here?”
#1270: “My mom has always hated my boyfriend. Now she says it’s because he resembles someone who abused her.”
Behind a cut for mention of child abuse, sexual abuse, and abuse from a therapist. See also, bullying about weight and fat-shaming. Basically a bingo card of triggering, problematic shit and a very awesome Letter Writer trying to handle it all gracefully. ❤ Dear Captain Awkward, I (31/she) started seeing my partner/boyfriend (33/he) in January … Continue reading #1270: “My mom has always hated my boyfriend. Now she says it’s because he resembles someone who abused her.”
#1267: “How do I set goals if I don’t want anything?”
Dear Captain Awkward: I'm a grown-ass woman who has been through a few cycles of therapy that have (along with medication) helped my stress, anxiety, and ADHD. I've gotten to a point where I am financially self-sufficient, comfortable in my life and community, and blessed with a strong friends network. I'm not in a relationship … Continue reading #1267: “How do I set goals if I don’t want anything?”
It Came From The Search Terms: Spring 2020
We are overdue for the blog feature where I answer the search strings people typed in to find this place as if they are questions. Let's do it! First, as is traditional, a song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b2ccC4aULow RIP to one of the coolest, realest artists I was lucky enough to share the space-time continuum with. :cries … Continue reading It Came From The Search Terms: Spring 2020