Content notes for alcohol addiction, emotional abuse, illness requiring hospitalization. O Captain, My Captain, My mother was always (imo) an emotionally abusive narcissist. I'm the oldest of 3 and the scapegoat. She became an alcoholic when I was 16 or 17, has been hospitalised with liver failure a number of times in the last 12 … Continue reading #1271: “I went no-contact with an abusive parent who is dying now. What are the rules here?”
Category: death
#1250: How do I support my (very-recently) ex-partner through his complex grief?
Content note: Mention of suicide Dear Captain Awkward 2 weeks ago my boyfriend (he/him/his) of 2 years made the decision to break up with me (cis/female). I moved out of our shared house and back with my parents and sister. I did not want the relationship to end and I hoped we could have worked … Continue reading #1250: How do I support my (very-recently) ex-partner through his complex grief?
Short Questions for August 2019: Part 2 of 2
Hello, monthly feature with short questions from patrons continues from the previous chapter. Q7: I am single in my 40s and have never had a serious long-term partner. I used to think I hadn’t met the right person yet but have recently come to understand that I’m aromantic (and probably demisexual - not ace but … Continue reading Short Questions for August 2019: Part 2 of 2
#1210: “My sister offers annual grief support that I don’t want.”
Content note: Letter mentions the long-ago death of a child. Dear Captain Awkward, Almost 14 years ago, my second child was born and died the next day. We received a very serious medical diagnosis mid-way through the pregnancy, so his death was not entirely unexpected. When he died, there was already a lot of drama … Continue reading #1210: “My sister offers annual grief support that I don’t want.”
#1188: Grief and the empty chairs at the wedding feast.
Dear Captain Awkward, After almost a year of planning, we're in the home stretch before my wedding day in early May. Everything was lining up smoothly until I reached out for RSVPs that hadn't been received yet, namely my stepdad, my aunt, and my grandmother (my dead mom's sister and mother). These are my only … Continue reading #1188: Grief and the empty chairs at the wedding feast.
#1187: “People from my past at my estranged father’s funeral (do not want).”
Hi Captain, My estranged father is about to die (I am working with family to make the degree of peace with which I feel comfortable). My mother died about a decade ago. Besides the problem of anticipatory grieving and emotions feelings around an estrangement, I am struggling with a desire not to go to his … Continue reading #1187: “People from my past at my estranged father’s funeral (do not want).”
#1101: “My dying grandfather doesn’t know I’m trans.”
Dear Captain, I've been out as a trans man for about three years. I came out to all of my extended family, with the exception of my grandfather. This was because he's increasingly doesn’t have a great grasp of what’s happening around him, and my parents thought it would be too hard to explain it … Continue reading #1101: “My dying grandfather doesn’t know I’m trans.”
#1067: “Boycotting my ex stepdad’s funeral.”
Dear Captain, Longtime lurker, first time LW. Thanks for providing such a safe, thoughtful & humorous space for thinking through life's issues. My ex-stepfather (XSF) is elderly, ill & failing. I foresee him dying sometime in the next year or so. I do not wish to go to his funeral, but I believe many members … Continue reading #1067: “Boycotting my ex stepdad’s funeral.”
#1052: “I’m meeting my boyfriend’s family this Thanksgiving. They’re all grieving the recent death of his mom. How do I be a good guest?”
Dear Captain, I've (27F) have been dating my boyfriend (33M) for about 6 months and things are wonderful. We've talked seriously about a future together and he's a great partner. He has invited me to spend Thanksgiving week with his dad, brother, and sister-in-law on the West Coast. *However*, his mom passed away suddenly earlier … Continue reading #1052: “I’m meeting my boyfriend’s family this Thanksgiving. They’re all grieving the recent death of his mom. How do I be a good guest?”
#1017: Future Family Funeral Fracas: “Can I stop my mom from acting like an asshole at my friend’s funeral?”
Hi Captain. Long time lurker, first time questioner. I need some advice with a future script please. Several years ago, my mum had a massive falling out with her best friend of decades - A. They have never made up and mum hasn’t talked to her and her husband since. Mum was distressed and upset … Continue reading #1017: Future Family Funeral Fracas: “Can I stop my mom from acting like an asshole at my friend’s funeral?”
