If he apologizes he might shatter into a million little pieces, this is Very Serious!
Category: comebacks
It Came From The Search Terms: Spring 2020
We are overdue for the blog feature where I answer the search strings people typed in to find this place as if they are questions. Let's do it! First, as is traditional, a song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b2ccC4aULow RIP to one of the coolest, realest artists I was lucky enough to share the space-time continuum with. :cries … Continue reading It Came From The Search Terms: Spring 2020
It Came From The Search Terms: Flaming September
Hello friends! It's that time, where we answer the things people typed into search engines as if they were questions. It's a good way to check in with people's preoccupations on a large, anonymous scale and it's usually pretty fun. First, as is traditional, a song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QZCiMp7F65o (Lyrics at the YouTube link) Also I know … Continue reading It Came From The Search Terms: Flaming September
It Came From The Search Terms: August
It's time for that thing we do, where we use the search strings people typed in to find this place as if they were questions. First, as is traditional, a song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=51&v=iBjo55ZvRnU Lyrics here. 1 "How to encourage husband to make friends." The subtext runs deep with this one, does it not? Like, where is … Continue reading It Came From The Search Terms: August
#1125: “I’m stressed and embarrassed whenever I have to go places with my bigoted parents.”
Behind a cut for the casual fatphobia, racism, and misogyny of entitled white folks of a certain age. Update: People are sharing some of the specific slurs and types of comments their bigoted relatives say and asking how to challenge those things esp. in the comments, so I would counsel POC and other marginalized folks … Continue reading #1125: “I’m stressed and embarrassed whenever I have to go places with my bigoted parents.”
#1120: The Creepy Guy In The Friend Group, Revisited: Four More Geek Social Fallacies
Content note: After the jump I mention Rape Threats Dudes Have Sent Me for saying what I think about creepy dudes. Dear Captain, Over the past several years I've drifted to the periphery of a friend group where one member is a sexist creep. I immediately found him slimy and pushy and off-putting upon meeting … Continue reading #1120: The Creepy Guy In The Friend Group, Revisited: Four More Geek Social Fallacies
#1112: “I’m still upset about my brother’s wedding toast.”
Dear Captain Awkward, Thank you so much for taking the time to read my question! Here's the situation: I got married nearly two years ago. For our wedding, we tried to keep things very simple and planned for two toasts, one from each side. I asked my best friend to give the toast on my … Continue reading #1112: “I’m still upset about my brother’s wedding toast.”
#1087: “Girlfriend and I are getting a dog, and people are being weird about it.”
Dear Captain, My girlfriend and I are getting a dog (jeey!). We are both women and some people have commented this is like getting a baby for us. It hurts to think about us not being able to reproduce “just like” a man and woman would be. Do you have any tips about reacting to … Continue reading #1087: “Girlfriend and I are getting a dog, and people are being weird about it.”
It Came From The Search Terms: Summer Pledge Drive Edition
I had a bunch of travel in July and never got that month's version up. So, here's another round of that thing where we answer people's search engine queries like blog questions. 1 "Awkward coworkers who wont get hint ." Hints don't work. They just create a sea of plausible deniability for clueless people to splash … Continue reading It Came From The Search Terms: Summer Pledge Drive Edition
#1003: “Getting married in 30 days and the parent drama is making me wish we’d eloped.”
Dear Captain Awkward, My wedding is in a month. There is new parental drama that makes me wish we were eloping. How do I still enjoy my wedding? Fiancée and I are introverts and did not want a huge wedding. My parents do not understand why we would not want 300 guests (despite numerous attempts … Continue reading #1003: “Getting married in 30 days and the parent drama is making me wish we’d eloped.”
