Greetings, it is the time for the periodic tradition where I answer search strings people typed in as if they are questions. First, I want to share a few links - Here I am at Vice, writing about family arguments, and I also want to call attention to S. Bear Bergman's recent post there: How … Continue reading It Came From The Search Terms: October Symphony (Oct. 2020)
Hi Captain, I’m wondering if you have a script for setting boundaries where there’s a significant power differential. Briefly, I’ve recently hired a lawyer who specializes in disability rights to represent me in a human rights case against a corporation that discriminated against me based on my mental health disability. The lawyer is very competent, … Continue reading #1276: “Setting boundaries when there’s a significant power difference (and you’re the one with less)”
Hello! It's Monday! I wrote a piece for Vice about how to ride out quarantine when it means moving back in with the same people you wrote to me for advice about "surviving" holiday visits with. It's a good match for Miss Conduct's column this week: "My daughter's 'useless' boyfriend is sheltering in place with … Continue reading Quarantine with difficult family & other “How To Stay In” links. #COVID-19
Here is the second post in this week’s collaboration between Jennifer P. from CaptainAwkward.com and Alison Green from Ask A Manager. Previously On: "Is it disloyal to leave a company who cut my pay and postponed my promotion?" (Nope! Cutting everyone's pay is like the part in the horror movie where the house says "get … Continue reading Ask A Manager & Captain Awkward Answer Questions: Part 2 of 2
My combined Christmas/birthday present this year was a trip to Washington, D.C. to catch up with some very old friends who were managing to be both in the same country and the same city all at the same time for the first time in almost 20 years. We've seen each other piecemeal over the years … Continue reading Two internet advice columnists walk into a bar: Captain Awkward & Ask A Manager Collaboration (Part 1 of 2)
I wrote a piece for VICE about taking good care of yourself during holiday visits with family. We're at work on the sequel about hosting holiday visits that people won't have to write to internet advice columns about. The therapist I spoke with for the Vice piece, Rae McDaniel, is a delight and had so … Continue reading Captain Awkward at Vice and other links.
Hi! I am 28, she/her. My sister in law ("A") is also 28 and my brother ("D") is 31. I have a question about gift etiquette. Last year on my birthday, A and D gave me a bunch of used DVDs. They got me slightly damaged copies of a couple movies and every season of … Continue reading #1237: “What to do about deliberately bad gifts?” A post about letting go of some etiquette rules when they no longer serve you.
Good news, Mikki Kendall's beautiful book, Amazons, Abolitionists, and Activists: A Graphic History Of Women's Fight For Their Rights, is finally out. The IndieBound link is above, Amazon is here, it's illustrated by the amazing A. D'Amico and just breathtakingly wonderful and gorgeous. Mr. Awkward is cataloging his year of ambitious projects with his blog/email … Continue reading Linkety Links + “We need to talk” vs. “Hey, knock it off” conflict management strategies
This piece written by Cass Ball is great. And you can safely replace "20s" with "any part of adulthood." Now's the part where I physically restrain myself from quoting the entire thing: "When I’m coming from a place of scarcity, a place where everything feels like it isn’t enough,I often feel that I’m insufficient without … Continue reading A++ Recommend! Scarleteen’s “Embracing Newbiehood: How to Approach Dating and Sex in Your 20s With Little or No Experience”
Hello! It's time for the monthly ritual where I answer short questions and give priority to the patrons who keep the lights on and the web-hamsters running. We've got twelve questions this week, I've written up the first batch and will post the rest later in the weekend. Topics: Passive-aggressive coworkers, celebrating a climb out … Continue reading Short Question & Answer Friday, July 26, 2019: Part 1 of 2