Evidence of life after escaping an abusive and toxic environment.
#1388: “A woman wants to bond with me over our shared history of an abusive man – and I’m struggling to be polite while also maintaining boundaries.”
Sometimes the enemy of your enemy is not your friend, and that's okay. Content note for mention (but not details) of past abusive relationships.
#1384: “Was I stating a boundary, or was I abusing?”
When someone is consistently mean to you, and you say "if you keep being mean to me, we might have to break up," may I humbly suggest that you are not The Problem.
5 Answers to “That’s Certainly A Question”
Answers to unpublishable questions, like a New Year's cleanse for upsetting letters.
#1358: GUEST POST: “I think my professors $#@%-ed me up.”
Thriller author Amy Gentry answers this letter about abusive professors who feed like vampires on the potential of their students.
#1337: About more than a mug: Boundaries, housemates, aggression
Introducing The Mug of Perpetually Being Mad At You
#1308: How do I deal with my edgelord friend?
Just spitballing here, but what if my fellow white people took bigotry in our social spaces incredibly fucking seriously for a change?
#1304: “Fox News stole my mom and replaced her with a ranting lady who won’t let me say or do anything without it setting her off. How do I get along with her until I can leave for college?”
On calling bluffs, escape velocity, and the futile, necessary, but probably still futile, work of reclaiming some of our relatives from history's flaming dumpster. Content note: Sometimes honestly talking about authoritarian stuff and white supremacy means describing it, so there are examples of actual racist and xenophobic statements from relatives herein.
#1300: “Chronically-single abuse survivor tired of dating disasters.”
What if a) loneliness really sucks and b) finding romantic love is not primarily an internal and external makeover project?
Update for #1208: “Question about Mom-friends being Too….’Mothering.'”
Once upon a time, a kind reader wrote in for advice about her friend, "Mary." Mary just cared about the Letter Writer SO MUCH, you see, that she felt entitled to advise her on any and all of life's challenges, kiss her on the top of the head, take over in the kitchen, recount a … Continue reading Update for #1208: “Question about Mom-friends being Too….’Mothering.'”