29 thoughts on “Single, horny people looking to survive this freezing hellscape…”

    1. I’ve apparently had this in my bookmarks since 2007.

      I am very happily, uh, blanket-forted these days, but oh, the roads not taken!

  2. I saw this in 2010, and I sent it to a gentleman with whom I was seriously flirting, even though there was absolutely no chance for us, since I was still married, lived in the US while he lived in Austria and also we had met on Facebook and just been chatting as friends for a year.

    The conversation it started turned into us confessing our mutual crushes, and a year later I married him and moved to Austria.

    So yes, I hope this guy got everything he could have possibly wished for and more.

    1. When I say “still married” I had, in fact, just moved out of my ex-husband’s house when this conversation happened. I realize that people here probably wouldn’t judge me for cheating — I try to always be understanding of others’ relationship decisions* — but I would judge myself.

      *imperfectly, but I continue to try

      1. Thanks. I was just giggling about this — this ad definitely got SOMEONE laid, whether or not the original poster was successful!

  3. (I like you you are great; and also I am super-uncomfortable with “crazy” as an intensifier?)

  4. Yeah, but I’m always sketched out when a dude asks for a lady’s picture first. Come on, Blanket Man. Factors for man to get laid: Awesome sense of humour. Factors for a lady to get laid: Looks. At least put your photo up too, Blanket Man!

    1. I understand your logic and why it looks like an unequal request, but I disagree, and here’s my logic!

      An interested lady will send her photo, and presumably ask for a photo in return before any casual encountering takes place. It all stays within email between the two interested parties.

      However, posting a photo in a CE ad reveals your identity to everyone who looks, as in, after 7 years this ad is still up and people would know he posted it. On a dating site where everyone makes profiles, your logic is sound, but on Craigslist I forgive preservation of anonymity.

      2. I agree with you about not posting one’s face on CL. However, I’m in the Rachel camp on who sends the first one. I think, when a man and a woman are corresponding, it’s an expression of good will for the man to send a picture first. The differential in potential bad outcomes for the man vs the woman is huge. I think men should volunteer a picture as a “Here I am, an identifiable human who you can send your friends after when you don’t come home in the morning” gesture.

  5. Did anyone else ever see the one by the guy who wanted a casual encounter with a woman while she played Super Mario? Dude was _super_ specific about what he wanted sexually, and it was a little… um… hetero/gender normative for my tastes, but I do kind of love the idea of a guy who knows what he wants, and what he wants is a lady who is playing Super Mario while they do it.

    1. This sounds strange, but I have considered putting an ad up that says “I will watch you play video games between makeout sessions” because I actually kind of like video games?

    2. Oh. Wow. Will never view that game in the same way again. Also, holy bacterial vaginosis, Batman.

  6. I love a witty Craigslist ad. Alas, I was taken in 2007 and I am taken now! Best wishes, Blanket Fort Don Juan.

  7. Aww hell yeah. Might be worth the drive…

    When I lived in a duplex with a bunch of college friends, my roommates and I threw a party where we encouraged our friends to bring sheets and blankets, and we built an elaborate and large blanket fort from the diningroom, through the livingroom, and out onto our three-season porch. We named it “Fort(s) Awesome.” (For some reason beyond my memory, pictures of James Van Der Beek featured prominently as well because I looked back at the pictures from that party and there was a lot of JVDB, so that was a joke long forgotten).

  8. I think his decision to not allow contact regarding, ‘services’, was a huge mistake, if you know what I’m saying.

    I helped make a blanket fort for a four year old recently and when the blanket fell on her head she just said, ‘Fort gone.’ I miss that kind of zen.

  10. My (now) husband’s birthday was about a week after we started dating, so rather than a gift I built him an epic blanket fort and filled it with snacks. Blanket forts are the best romantic gesture. I hope some architect women responded being all “YES LETS DO THIS” and they then built a blanket fortress and went on to rule their blanket kingdom happily, because that’s amazing.

  11. Following Mallory Ortberg’s advice, I will embrace being That Guy: he gets its/it’s right the first time, but not the second. Because this also raises the troubling possibility that he just lucked into the first one, it seriously erodes his Grammar-Related Attractiveness.

  13. I have a quick (off-topic) question for the Captain. I remember a while ago you mentioned a website that you use to write down your thoughts and anxieties at the beginning of the day – just unburden them for 10-15 minutes. And then possibly you delete them? (I don’t remember all the details…) What’s this site? (Again, if I’m remembering this correctly…) Thanks!

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