12 comments
  1. I need to preface this by saying that I love what you do here Captain. Really! You provide such great advice and little life tidbits that I love and have been able to use on many occasions. Normally I love your link reccomendations (you introduced me to ‘Bitches gotta eat’, for that I’m eternally grateful). But this, not so much.

    I just read this article. I clicked on it because I was hoping for a little solidarity, you know, a little ‘yay, shitty things happen to other people and not just me’ boost. Well I didn’t get what I came for. If these are examples of ‘life ruining’ problems then I’m more fucked than I thought. So what if all your friends are fighting? I had to make the choice between buying medication OR groceries. Not and, or! And that’s not even remotely in the same state with what I’d consider my biggest problem. Perhaps I read it for the wrong reasons. I probably overlooked some real gems of advice in my judgey-rage. I also am probably not in the best headspace to read it at the moment (can you tell?).

    I’m off to figure out how I can drive my car 300km a week for the change I find in my couch.

    • JenniferP said:

      She’s writing to teenagers at a site for teenagers. So the problems are more teenaged. Except for the part where she writes about her friend having a maybe-terminal illness?

      I hope things get better for you, and I once again say “You may not like or relate to everything I link (and write) here. Oops.”

      • I’m sure things will perk up, these things come in waves. I need to re-read when I’m not so grrr because there are probably some actual gems hidden between the teenage angst.

        On another note, is ‘The Wardrobe’ available anywhere on the web? I must know what’s inside dammit!

        • JenniferP said:

          I’m offering a download as the perk for my next pledge drive (June), but I’m not ready to launch that yet.

      • Also, if you read the comments, it’s a good reminder that what we adults consider Major Life Problems are not reserved for people of voting age. Several people talk about losing a parent; one girl talks about her sister attempting suicide; others talk about being diagnosed with disabling illnesses.

        • JenniferP said:

          Yeah, I’m working my way through them now. Heartbreaking stuff (and awesome responses from the other Rookies – that’s a great community).

          • It totally is! It makes me retroactively sad that it didn’t exist when I was a teenager.

  2. This is just fucken brilliant:

    Happiness is like living in a big house, and only visiting a few big, sunny, well-cleaned rooms. That’s great; I’m not anti-happiness. Who could be? But, in the house of anyone’s mind or life, there are always rooms that haven’t been cleaned yet. Rooms that no one visits, places where junk is piled up and mice infest the floorboards and make nests out of old newspapers, dark and dim and unwelcoming inner places that everyone would prefer just to ignore.

  3. GraciousAtheist said:

    Chiming in to say that this piece is absolutely brill. I’ve had my life ruined (and/or ruined my life) over half a dozen times now, and the following is true for as long as I have been alive:

    “No matter how big this feels, one of these days, you’re going to wake up in the morning, and you won’t be in a catastrophe anymore; you’ll be in your post-catastrophe life. It will have changed, but it won’t have to be horrible.”

  4. Simone Lovelace said:

    This is so, so good. I agree that it doesn’t apply to all situations. Sometimes, you life is really, actually ruined for a long time, possibly permanently. (See the “how to talk to people who are telling you something sad” post for many heartbreaking examples.)

    But for the survivable-but-still-deadful “life-ruining” events, this is stop-on. Definitely summarizes a lot of the stuff I kinda sorta figured out while getting though the Epic Breakup of 2011. O_o

    • Ldubs said:

      I don’t know? With the exception of dealing with a potentially life-ruining illness, I think she’s dead on. Some tragedies just take longer to work through.

%d bloggers like this: