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How Not To Be

#523: Life with a no-good, very bad terrible driver

Dear Captain Awkward, I have a wonderful fiancée.  She’s compatible with me in every single way and we’re looking forward to starting our lives together.  Save one little thing.  She’s possibly the worst driver in the world and I can’t get my license until awhile after the wedding for reasons I prefer not to get […]

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#522: Dealing with chatty racist strangers

Hello Captain! I have a question about racist strangers who think I am their friend. Occasionally, I’ll be out in public waiting in line, reading at the library or just waiting for the bus and a stranger will approach me and feel compelled to make a racist observation about someone else who is present. I […]

#488: My friend’s new hobby is grossing everyone out, and, he likes it that way.

Dear Captain Awkward, Things have started getting *awkward* with a good friend of mine, and I need advice on how to handle it. He’s this really quirky guy – I met him through my boyfriend – and since we all have a silly sense of humour we enjoy having a laugh (usually with a good […]

#487: I use a wheelchair, and people are condescending as fuck.

Dear Captain Awkward: I’m woman in my late 30s who uses a power wheelchair due to a medical condition that causes severe physical fatigue. Often, strangers – retail staff, waitstaff, members of the general public – assume that because I use a power wheelchair, I have an intellectual disability. I don’t. I have a university […]

#477: I have anxiety that women will have anxiety about me approaching them.

Comments are now closed on this discussion.   <b>Edited To Add</b>: By request, there is a GIANT CONTENT WARNING on this post and the comments. It is not recommended that anyone suffering from anxiety read this post or the comments. Or, really anyone at all. It represents a major, major mistake and unkindness and able-ism […]

#468 and #469: “Hey, knock it off”, or, Constructive Conflict, Continued.

Jolly’s great comment to Monday’s post is going to be very relevant to these seemingly very different questions: “You also don’t necessarily have to bring some of these things up in one big confrontation about The Whole Pattern Of Her Sucking. You could just make a point of standing up for yourself when she does […]

#434: Just me and my shadow, trying to network.

Hi Captain Awkward, A few months ago, I met a guy who works in my field through a professional networking event. Since then, I have noticed that he has such a brutal case of White Knight Syndrome that he will actually create Drama just to “save” the women who happen to be in his presence, […]

Open Thread: Crushes

I am heading to Texas for the first time ever tomorrow morning, to hang out with my sweetheart’s family & friends. January is a good time to get the hell out of Chicago for a few days, yes? So I won’t be posting regularly for about the next week. In the meantime, per someone’s request […]

#402: Do I have to sit through dinner with someone who was a big jerk to me?

Hi Captain Awkward, At a party over the weekend, I met a woman who was so verbally agressive to me, so insulting and so poisonous, that I still feel a little nauseous today. She’s the girlfriend of someone who I’ll be seeing again and again (he, my boyfriend and I share the same small-world past […]

#395: Confronting offensive bosses and coworkers.

Dear Captain Awkward, I have a dilemma that I suspect is quite common, but I’m still running into mental roadblocks as to how to properly approach it. Background: I’m a lesbian and a big-eff Feminist working in a male-dominated field, in a male-dominated company. I’ve worked marketing, event planning and PR for rape crisis centres, […]


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