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Advice Columns

Your friend isn’t “a batshit harpie,” she’s sad and handling it very badly.

Jezebel has an advice column about friendship, which I wish was not called “Friendzone.” The first and third responses in last week’s post were pretty spot on, but the second letter, here, about the expat leaving town and the friend getting suddenly clingy, is unsettling and the response is also unsettling. Real talk: Refusing to […]

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#512: Can I quit my unpaid internship?

Ahoy, Awkwardeers. I graduated university about two months ago, and right now I work at a tiny indepedent publishing house. Well, I say “work”; they cover my travel expenses and feed me lunch, but I’m not getting paid, which I didn’t care about when I started because I thought it would be interesting. Nominally, I […]

Guest Post #496: I No Longer Have Pantsfeelings for the Only Partner I’ve Had

[Content note: purity culture] Dear Captain Awkward, I am married. My husband is a very lovely, supportive man, very devoted and considerate, and a great father to our small child. We’ve been together nearly a decade, and married for most of that time. We are a good partnership. He was the first person I ever […]

Adding to what Bookslut said….

I have some practical things to add to  today’s Bibliomancer column (which I love reading, but today = eeeeeeesh). Letter Writer, whatever you decide to do about investigating & interrogating the effect “Doug” holds on your past, there is some practical shit you can do to get the actual dude out of your actual life. You […]

#392: Overdue apologies.

Before we dig into today’s letter, I really like this “Ask Polly” piece at The Awl, I Miss My Maniac Ex. The Maniac Ex is what we around these parts would call a Darth Vader boyfriend. So you focus on that one magical night, in the middle of a sea of terrible nights, where he […]

#391: How To Train Your Rageasaurus

Howdy Cap’n~ My mother had an affair and left my father for my former best friend and coworker, whom she met thru me and my job. This happened over a year ago, and I’m past the initial shock.. I came to realize I cannot change what happened, and that I can either stay angry about […]

#242: Can I Tell Guys I Don’t Want to Date Them Before They Ask Me to Date Them?

Dear Capt. Awkward, So, I’m a 25 year old lady. Like a lot of your readers (I think?) I’ve never really had a lot of dating success, and definitely have never had a boyfriend. This sometimes makes me feel a little sad, but I’ve never really gone out there in pursuit of a boyfriend, and […]

#209: My mom is pressuring me to invite my molester to my wedding, and it sucks BIG TIME.

Hello everyone. Captain Awkward here. This post involves some deeply harrowing no-good shit, so we’re putting everything behind a cut. Also of note: This post, you’ll notice the byline above, is a guest contribution of Marie (of The House is full of EVIL BEES fame), now promoted to Private First Class in the Awkward Army. […]

Rich is back!

And he’s still a dipshit. When last we saw our hero, he was comparing confident women who are hard to control  to “dirty snow.”  On the subject of rejecting strangers who want your number in bars, he says this: The best way for a girl to avoid that awkward first date is to not give […]

Graduation Day

My friends and former students are graduating!  Many of you are probably graduating! Dear Sugar made a graduation speech, and ladies and gentleman, if that woman decided to start a church I would try to go to that church. When I graduated from college, my graduation speaker was Richard Holbrooke and he patiently explained to […]


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